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These people won’t matter in yours either if you don’t let them.
Don’t engage your ex once their deceit becomes apparent because it will be used against you further down the line, whether it’s them or the people who they’ve spread rumours to.
As humans, we have a disposition to concern ourselves with what others think.
It hurts when we do our best to be decent people, to love and care generously (sometimes too much so), only for that to be mistaken for weakness and treated like this bad thing that makes us tricky to offload.
I still occasionally think of two particular social circles who were misinformed by a couple of my exes.
Baggage Reclaim is a guide to learning to live and love with self-esteem by breaking the patterns that stand in your way.
There’s a common misconception that breakups only happen to ‘bad’ people or where something terrible happened, which is akin to suggesting that breakups are an emergency measure reserved for the most horrific of relationship illnesses, when in reality, you could be The Nicest Most Fabulous Person Ever TM and short of only ever being in and staying in one relationship, you’re going to be broken up with and do the breaking.
That is of course unless you’re one of those people who always gets in there first, but that’s the subject of another post.
But don’t devote too much time to them because you have a life to live…without them.
The best rebuttal in this situation is to live your life well instead of hiding away or devoting your life to defending and convincing this person or their homies (or cronies).